Friday, April 2, 2010

tha lay-deez

When asked if I find a given female celebrity (like Megan Fox or Angelina Jolie) attractive, I usually say no. The asker is usually confused, and I am then asked what women I like, which is kind of a labor for me to answer. Maybe women is the wrong word. I'm 23 right now, so.....Girls? I'm not sure. I think there's probably a little bit of universal attractiveness to be had, some women out there that pretty much everyone can agree are attractive. But for the most part I think taste in the opposite sex is like taste in anything: different for everyone. I'm an odd person; I like stuff that I think most people have little interest in, and I think that translates to the area of preference in women. As far as celebs go, I tend to like the girls who people know, but wouldn't have guessed I liked. I've tried to come up with a 'type', but that's hard to do, as I like all different kinds. Physical traits can be attractive or unattractive to me depending on whether I already like the actress/singer/athlete/whatever for what they do, but if I had to generalize in terms of physical looks, I'd say: I have a small preference for europeans and asians, I like dark hair and fair skin, though those are by no means absolute likes. They're more like trends I've noticed and not actual driving preferences. I think the best way to describe it is to just list a few girls I like and include a pic. I've known girls who were drop dead gorgeous in real life but for some reason didn't translate to still photographs quite AS well. How a girl acts is just as appealing to me anyway, so I think I'll include videos where I deem it beneficial. I also freely and completely acknowledge that I'm not attractive myself, and to make a list like this is kind of.......misogynistic or hedonistic or something. I'm just doing this for fun and because I think guys with my tastes are underrepresented when compared to those who like the women mentioned earlier. Have fun like I am and don't take it too seriously, and know that in real life I do in fact have respect for women. Anyways. By the grace of google image search, my typing hands, and youtube, I present them in no specific order:

1. Summer Glau

From: Firefly, Terminator SCC, Dollhouse
I don't find many girls on TV or in movies more attractive than her. Superficially I'd say she's probably the most attractive girl on the list, but I wouldn't have put her on this list if there wasn't something else to like. For example, I think Hayden Panettiere is incredibly (I don't use this word often) hot, but she looks like a bitch, so I just plain don't like her. Summer Glau's a fantastic actress and is also fairly talented athletically, and from what I hear is very nice in real life. Oh, and she's (duh) gorgeous. I don't like to pick absolute favorite anythings, but if I did she'd definitely be in the running for #1.

2. Zooey Deschanel

From: 500 Days of Summer, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Flakes

* Edit 4/21/12: I wrote this a long time before her fame exploded. Just seems noteworthy, as saying you like Zooey Deschanel these days kind of makes you look like a tool. Just like clarifying that you liked someone or something before other people. Wait...

My crush on her has kind of tapered as of late, all thanks to 500 Days and how it ends with her kind of looking like a bitch. I still like how she's got an eccentricity about her, like she's a weird girl and that's kind of what makes her attractive. The weird girls are usually more interesting to me provided it's not annoying. It kind of says to me that she thinks differently. It's a quality that a lot of people "fake" these days thanks to movies, but I'm usually good at spotting the difference.

3. Emmy Rossum

The Day After Tomorrow, Phantom of the Opera, she also sings (well)

To be honest, I'm not a huge huge fan of the movies she's been in. I had no interest in seeing Phantom and my sister is a much bigger fan of The Day After Tomorrow. Still, she still played a fantastic and very very attractive love interest for Jake Gyllenhaal. I was actually sympathetic for him and his failure to impress her early on. She also has a singing career, and I've listened to it and it's not half bad. I didn't even know she sang until she popped up on Pandora. She kind of sounds like Enya mixed with Kate Havnevik. She's dating that guy from the Counting Crows, which kind of puzzles me and upsets me at the same time. He's gotta be at least 40. I'm 23 and I've never even been on a date, and this guy is dating girls like half his age.

4. Imogen Heap
From: She sings, writes and produces

Oh yes I dih-id. She's my favorite recording artist ever. Like, EVER. I found out about her sometime after 2005 but before 2008 and I've been in love with her music ever since. If you've never heard it, I obviously recommend it. She's not a conventional type of attractive, but I happen to think she's good-looking, and I also know that this opinion of mine is heavily motivated by that fact that I listen to her a lot. She's got a lot of the 'crazy weird' thing I mentioned earlier; she dresses oddly for award shows and uses all sorts of creative sources for sounds when recording. Those of you who know me personally know that I usually take a long time with decisions, but I think if she showed up on my doorstep and said "Marry me", I probably would just do it. C'mon I bet you'd do it for that one celebrity too.

5.Alysson Hannigan

From: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, American Pie, Date Movie (ugh), How I Met Your Mother

I recently discovered Buffy, and it's a great show. The Buffy character is great, and Sarah Michelle Gellar is beautiful and all, but I tend toward the more quiet girls. Her character is intellectual and geeky, and a lot of the humor in the show is based on how moralistic she is, which ironically is hot to me. She almost always played a character like that for years, but since HIMYM started, she does characters that play that up a lot less. Maybe it's just because she's just not a teenager now.

[EDIT] I've realized, several months after writing this, that I'm not necessarily talking about Alysson. I'm talking mostly about her character on Buffy, Willow Rosenberg. I stand corrected.

[EDIT EDIT] I also realized that I provided a verbal work-around for that in the article. Corrected.

6.Jun Ji Hyun

My Sassy Girl, I'm not sure what else

I had to include at least one asian girl. Sorry. Again, I'm not only attracted to her because she's cute, its also in how she acts. It's really hard to explain now that I'm tasked with it. Like, I'm pretty sure I know what I like about her, it's just kind of hard to verbalize. In the movie, she's best referred to as bizarre. She and her not-boyfriend boyfriend have a lot of fun doing stuff based on whatever random thing she thinks of or wants to do. On a subway car, they play a game that results in them "betting" slaps, one day they trade shoes, and another day they get held hostage. They just have a lot of unconventional fun and somehow that amplifies my attraction to her. It's weird. Again, the Willow syndrome must be acknowledged: I'm talking about her character in a show/movie, yes, but I'm pretty sure for all intents and purposes in this article, that's fine

Ok so there it is. My favorite off-the-top-of-my-head womens. Im writing this little conclusion several months later, after fixing some of the dead links and pics that I was unsatisfied with. Believe it or not it's kind of hard to find pictures of them that match the kind of tone I try to keep here. Apparently that's a thing. Some are way too glamorized or studio'd-out, others are candids from the street and honestly I think that'd be kinda creepy to put them here. I also fixed the Zooey Deschanel video; it was wider than the space. This was one of the most fun articles for me to write because before this I never really spoke about what kinds of girls I like. I don't really joke about women in the "I would sooo do her" way most guys do, and because of that I just never talked about it. By writing it, believe it or not, I kind of learned a few things about myself, which is usually fun. Usually. 

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